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Wednesday, October 26, 2005
huwaw
*buntunghininga*This week's been kinda okai :D nothing really shocking :D You might think that I think to mcuh but I have been and even I don't knwo why. :D Seems like I'm drifting away..again..but this time with another person =( Maybe I'm just distancing myself away from her/them. Maybe I just need more time to find myself and where I should place myself. Lately, I always find myself thinking about random thoughts and I end up dwelling on these thoguhts for days..sometimes weeks. Grabeh..huwats happening to me?! Maybe it's a sign of insanity...aah..I get it. Insanity. Maybe one day, all the people I know would just wave at me and say "hi!" not because I'm famous..because I'm insane. But..seriously..I'm not. During one computer period..I decided to sleep while listening to music since I'm done with the activity. When I woke up..I felt alone..right away. I wanted to go back to sleep but I just can't..grr. I'm awake na nga talaga. So..I was bored. I decided to just look around. I saw this group of people. I'm kinda close to them. I was just starring at them and a random thoguht entered my brain..(yes, I do have a brain) oh..they are so lucky that they have friends like their friends now.. and I've been dwelling on that. I envy them. They are so lucky..grabeh :D Kasi I lost friends that were so close to me. sad nga eh. now I'm alone. kahit na I still say "hi" and "hello" to that friend.. I guess our closeness couldn't be like before. We hardly even hang out with each other. She's always with her friends and when I see her with her friends, I go look for other people. hindi naman ako nagpaparinig eh. just saying how I feel. I thought nga na after..we would be back to normal and stuff but then I find it hard to be epal sa kanila kasi parang there's this awkward feeling between us. *sigh* oh life.. My friend just got into a car crash. Good thing he is still alive. Grabeh.. no wonder. I've been texting and making kulit but the reply is always "please pray for (name) coz he is still weak from the accident" kala ko ginugood time lang ako.. it's true pala! hahahaha :D how smart am I?! VERY. XD please pray for him nga pala. His situation is sort of critical. If he dies.. please donate money to me.. kahit na pang starbucks lang..joke :D pero..seryoso..pray for him ha :D Anyways.. we had a rocked concert yesterday. This new band played. Is it Calla or Kala or Cala or Kalla? Basta. They're good :D WHen I heard their band name, the first thought that came into my mind is Callalily!! hott hott band! :D The vocalist is good! Phat is good! :D hahaha:D oh..last friday :D oct 21.. I went to St. Scho for Centenial Rock I dunno what it is for but the bands who played were soo good!! 6cyclemind, Nerveline, Protein Shake, Imago, Sponge Cola, Hiraya and Dicta Liscence.. grabeh. I was supposed to be there alone with my cousin but then.. I saw Billie! yay! I wasn't alone at all. Grabeh. Lesbian capital=st. scho 6cyclemind rocks talaga!! They are just so cool! :D hehehehe:D In their new video "Sandalan", Kean was there! yeah! so hott!:D Anyways.. ther is nothing really that's interesting. Maybe I've just been thinking a lot lately. as in super. :D I haven't been talking to that friend nor texting that friend. I haven't been updated. Nagsasawa na ba ako? Maybe sa sobrang ayokong mawala siya sa akin, I'm distancing myself na. what am I saying? (pare, gutom lang yan..)
22:03
Sunday, October 16, 2005
tagal na since the last time I posted here..hahaha:D anyways... The week that just passed was sooo hectic...hhmmm. Monday-KKK. barrista was cancelled..sadness. but I went to HRM and it was so much fun.yay! Tuesday-classes[palanca-making and cramming day :D] Wednesday-class encounter[no one really cried] Thursday & Friday-retreat. During the retreat I discovered that I am slightly incapable of crying. I tried hard and so did Mara. Maybe pretty people aren't meant for crying-labo :D Also I was put in Bethany..room mates with Giselle..I ate chips inside..she didn't want any. Palancas I received were better that last years and sweet too. I also realized that the person I love isn't mine anymore...I don't own anyone but I used to think that that person was mine. When I found out that person's special friend it broke my heart coz I thought na friends lang sila..then best friends and now..somewhere nearing a relationship na. ouch talaga. no matter how much that person denies it, it is soooo halata. But if you love some one you must learn how to let go. I wasn't even holding on to anything worth holding on to. But since I love that person so much, maybe I'll just support them and be happy for them.
14:37
Monday, October 3, 2005
..(untitled kunwari)...
I feel so cold, feel so numb I'm having nightmares but I'm awake. Help me Lord, fight this loneliness take this pain away that song. When the light disappears and when nothing seems clear, You'll be safe here. From the shear weight of your doubts and fears, weary heart, You'll be safe here. that song. I was once addicted to it. It got around and got popular so I didn't love it anymore. wassup? nothing but the ceiling bhaybhie!!-my ever famous line. hahaha :D Diba't sinabi mo sa akin dati na mahirap kumain ng tsokolateng natunaw at wala nang korte. Mahirap nang kainin mukha nang tae. ewan ko ba kung bakit mahirap ibalik, sa original na hugis pagnalusaw na sa init. once again another song. isa pa. I am BEAUTIFUL. It's bad to lie and that's the truth..hahahahaha :D If things are slowly going back to normal and time is running fast, I consider myself lost in the midst of nowhere. Maybe somewhere where no one gives a khurr about me. that's olrayt. I have been talking to Pats a lot. It's so amazing how one's life can be so shocking coz she knows some one you know. common friends. Sometimes I'm overamazed but then... I can't stop other people's feelings just to save my own right? I am very very selfish. I don't like sharing--------------people..buyt I'm fine sharing food..hahahahahaha :D so anyways..hahaha :D I just love Thea, Pats, Missy and Michelle S. they sit around me. It's so much fun see, no one takes some thing very very seriously..as in seryosong seryoso..life is fun when you screw up right? :D but then when you screw up too much it brings pain. hahahaha:D love me. I love me. (huwatta lie.) :D
21:38
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